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In Igbo land for example, on the day of
the deceased husband's burial ceremony, his elder sister (Ada) washes the hands
of the widow with water and rub them with an unbroken egg which is thrown away
into the bush. After this ritual, the widow goes into one month of seclusion
without washing her body. The widow is also required to perform purification
and ablution rituals. She wears fiber garment and shaves off
her hair. At the end of one year of mourning, the widow discards the fiber
garment and can re-marry if she so desires. This trauma sets the plight of
widows in Igbo land on the litany of woes.
In Yoruba land, a widow is believed to
be the property of late husband and so cannot inherit his property. Only children,
brothers, and uncles are allowed to inherit the dead person’s property. This
exclusion of a widow from the inheritance is a plight of widowhood in Yoruba
land which should be addressed in momentarily, although it will be tall order.
The Edo people represented by Esan and
Etsako ethic groups, inquires into the cause of the husband's death. They also
subject widows to different abuses if they are suspected of being responsible
for the husband death. Etsako people consult the oracles after the death of the
husband and the widow is forced to swear at a shrine if she is accused of
killing the husband. The Esans subject the widow to
different mistreatments if she is suspected of killing the husband. In most
cases, the widow is forced to drink the water used in washing the legs of the
dead husband to prove her innocence. She mourns the husband for seven days in
seclusion, eat from unwashed plates, run round the house or farm of the dead
husband stark naked in broad day light and wear old clothes during the mourning
period. After the mourning period the widow she
is inherited either by the first son of the late husband if he was a polygamist
or the brother-in-law if monogamist. This becomes a traumatic experience if the
widow refuses to re-marry the brother or son of the dead husband chosen for
her.
The Delta people, especially the
Uhrobos, Isokos and Ndokwas are strict with a widow, especially if she is a
prime murder suspect of her husband's death. The Delta people believe that a
man can hardly dies a natural death unless someone is be responsible. So, If
the widow is suspected to be the killer, serious tortures will be directed
towards her and the deceased's property is shared amongst the children and his
brothers, while the widow is betrothed to another brother of the late husband.
However, if she objects to remarriage within the same family,
she is made to refund the bride price paid on her.
The Ndokwa people (Delta State), would
inquire into the cause of death of a deceased husband and if the wife is
suspected to be responsible, she will be forced to perform certain rituals
before the husband is buried. The widow is thrown over the coffin by some
strong men up to seven times and if she happens to fall down in the process, it
is believed that her hands were involved in the death of the husband.
The Yaba peoples will whisk the widow
from her late husband's house to the most elderly man within the family or clan
during the mourning period. The widow is guarded by one of the sister-in-laws
for forty days during which she is monitored to find out if she is pregnant.
The widow will wear one dress throughout this period, bath in the presence of
other widows, touch earthenware tripod and cook food for the whole villagers.
After this ritual, the widow is allowed to re-marry within the family. But if
she objects this demand, she is allowed to go empty handed.
Similarly, in the Tiv society, a woman
enters into the family or community of the husband as a worker and bearer of
children for the whole ethnic group. She is the wife of the whole community in
the cultural sense (that is without other males having sexual intercourse with
her, except her legal husband). Even when the husband dies, her marriage in the
family still continues. In some cases, a
surrogate or proxy husband is found amongst her husband's brothers to take care
of her, help her in the farm and support her in various other ways. Even when
the woman becomes a widow, the families try to help her adjust to the new life. Despite that, the widow faces
challenges of widowhood. One important thing to note here is that unlike the
widower who could not show outward demeanor and expression of
loss, grief and sorrows in some situations, the widow can exhibit feelings and
actions which show confusion and contemplation due to the sudden departure of
her beloved husband.
Sometimes, the widow's shocking
experience is recounted over and over again as she searches for her late
husband. This results in other symptoms, some of which are the bereaved widow
expressing fearful anxiety which soon takes on the parlaying effects on the
family. This non-adjustment to stress results in illness that is benumbing; the
weeping in bed and hospitalization becomes a daily occurrence, apathy and antipathy,
including illness of social collapse, is also noticed. Psychologically too,
back pain, muscles cramp, vomiting, lump throat, blurred vision, singing and
whispering attitudes, abdominal emptiness, hair loss, tenor voice, day-night-rhythms, feeling of
separation from the deceased husband, hallucinations, feelings of guilt,
debility, heightened hostility towards other people and restlessness.
Other ailments include tension,
jitteriness, hopelessness, persistent, watery eyes, melancholy, attempts to
commit suicide and unusual pattern of speech when speaking about the deceased
husband. Thus, the plight of widowhood creates a state of mind and behavior
characteristics, which can be understood within social-economic structure and
social adjustment systems.
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1 comments:
Dnt kno abt odaz bu dt abt yoruba is a lie
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